I'm not sure the direction of this "blog" yet. I think it'll be half fun, half serious, all amazing! I hope to post entertaining, if not bewildering!, text not quite as frequently as the New York Times, but more frequently than the Brockhaus Encyclopedia.
I guess the hot topic at the moment is fresh-out-of-the-closet emo-boy Kanye West. Kanye has gone from being a badass who calls out the President on national television to a guy who cries on stage. How emo! His earlier songs have titles like, "We Don't Care", "Get Em High", and "Crack Music." How thug! Now his songs have titles like, "Love Lockdown", and "Heartless!" (If you thought the original "Love Lockdown" sucked, then check out this mashup!)
The lyrics in Kanye's new songs prove his emo-transformation, "So you walk around like you don't know me/ You got a new friend, well I got homies/ But in the end it's still so lonely." So emo! But, Kanye gets gangsta points for the use of "homies." The use of homies prevents white, non-gangsta emo-bands such as Death Cab for Cutie or I Would Set Myself on Fire for You, from covering Kanye's shizz (tight-panted emo-boys everywhere are creaming themselves over that bands name alone!).
Not to go off on a tangent, but what the fuck?! What kind of a band name, or even statement is, "I would set myself on fire for you?!" Where does setting yourself on fire get you exactly? The hospital, maybe? But it sure as hell won't get you a girl (or man if you are of the inferior gender... or gay. Just kidding! Love ya fags and hos!)! There is nothing that turns a girl off more than being on fire. Nothing. Anyway...
Besides going totally gay for emo, Kanye West has also gone insane. Check out his blog. It's more or less a Toys R Us catalog for Kanye. Half of his blog looks like Ikea in the year 2038 (we never used to say "in the year" in the '90s, what happened?!). He shows us some weird lamp he either wants, owns, or invented in his free time.
He also posts pictures of spaceships, ear pencil sharpeners (probably the most disturbing thing ever), and Ellen Degeneres. What do those three things have in common? Kanye owns all of them! As well as Fonzworth Bentley! Yes, the umbrella guy from the Outkast video. Kanye West owns him! Unbelievable!
Well, I'm tired of typing and hyperlinking... so here's a few closing things I think are funny and/or incredible!:
- Death by stereotype.
- This guy's general appearance.
- Stuff White People Like.
- Stuff Black People Hate.
- Barack Obama.
Peace & Love Homies!
Andrew
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